9:15 pm

It's a sad day. There are too many people crying and upset over 9/11. I was working in an office at a private club, the bartender came to me and asked if I heard what was going on. My heart sank and I followed him out to the bar. I couldn't move. It was a sad day. And now everyone is remembering.

It's so hard being me. Why do I have to feel so much?? I am so cold. Emotionally. Physically. And why do I affect the weather?? I'm sad today and it's cold. I was happy yesterday and it was hot as hell.

I don't want this. I don't want to feel all this. My heart can't take this much pain. I want to leave these nightmares.

I don't feel like I belong here anymore

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